I sometimes say, I'm not sure if I should be happy about it. I said this to a friend of mine and she had a reply I will always remember. She said, "I think there is a lot to be happy about." And she is totally right. There is so much to be happy about. The waiting so long means that I continue to live in limbo, always waiting. But it also means that I've been given another year to live.
I remember when the nurse came in to tell me that I was approved for a new heart. I try my best to be strong at all times but that moment went straight to my heart, literally. It is a very stringent process to be approved for the transplant list. Unfortunately there are many people that don't get approved. They assess your overall health and mental state. Can you physically and emotionally accept the transplant. Well, on Thursday October 22, 2009 they told me I was given the chance to live. Live on. I was aware of the risks but I was convinced that I would succeed. And I will! Thanks to the evolution of science, the doctors and all of their staff. I will live on. That moment gave me a feeling of hope and strength. Hope that I will do the things I love to do again. And strength that I can push through whatever comes next. Live on. Live to be with my amazing husband and loving family. Live to make a difference for other people waiting for transplants, waiting for their life to change. Live forever thankful for the journey I have taken, never to resent it. Live happily. Live strong. Live completely. I will live on.
I think there are a lot of positives to being on the list for so long. I think you truly make the most out of life while on the list. You literally live each day like its your last! You tell those close to you that you love them much more frequently, just incase. And those around you pull together in ways they never knew they could, in a way it brings them and you all closer together.
ReplyDeleteBut it is also hard and stressful. Having to look after yourself all the time, not letting lose as your body just cant.
But if you can spend this long waiting, then, I think the chances of you living a long and happy life are much improved. :)
Keep fighting, I admire you.
You inspire me each day. Thank you for this message. Pray for you.
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